The Fascinating Life and Times of Me

I was glad to be on the ground and away from the terrible birds, and I rolled my tired and battered body gratefully in the weeds and dirt. I chewed on some of the weeds, trying to settle my nervous stomach. Then I groomed my sap-covered tail for a moment before I sat up on my haunches, scanning the horizons and sniffing the air.

Scrubby dry grass lay before me in all directions, stopping only when it meet the blue sky at the horizon. The afternoon sun blazed down on me ominously. There was no doubt about it, I was lost.

Lesser cats then I might have felt discouraged at this moment. Surely a dog would resign itself to certain death. But I am no inferior creature. Off to my right I could smell car exhaust and hear a distant hum. Cars meant roads, and my home was on a road, so that must be the right direction.

I set off resolutely towards the noise, but paused after a few steps. Did I really want to go home? I sat back down and mulled over it. The prospect of freedom was alluring. I could live off the land, in the wild like my feline ancestors. But I am a domestic goddess. Hunting is fine for sport, but hunting for survival is not so dandy. The main reason I stay with the moronic people and insipid cats are the twice-daily feedings. My mind flashed back to my kittenhood, and the harsh realities of eating out of dumpsters and sleeping under shrubbery on long, cold, rainy nights. As lousy as my home was, it was better than no home at all. I resigned myself to this fate.

Besides, I thought, maybe I would find a better home on my journey. I perked up at this thought, and set out toward the road.
To be Continued...